SECTION
FOUR
Transformation of the Physical
NO NEED to despise the physical being −
it is part of the intended manifestation.
It
is because your consciousness in the course of the sadhana has come into contact
with the lower physical nature and sees it as it is in itself when it is not
kept down or controlled either by the mind, the psychic or the spiritual force.
This nature is in itself full of low and obscure desires, it is the most animal
part of the human being. One has to come into contact with it so as to know
what is there and transform it. Most sadhaks of the old type are satisfied with
rising into the spiritual or psychic realms and leave this part to itself −
but by that it remains unchanged, even if mostly quiescent, and no complete transformation
is possible. You have only to remain quiet and undisturbed and let the higher
Force work to change this obscure physical nature.
All
that may be very well in theory, but practically it is found that the physical
impurity is strong enough to bar the inner progress and limit rigidly the inner
experience to some passive peace.
The
opportunity for these contrary forces is given when the sadhak descends in the
inevitable course of the sadhana from the mental or the higher vital plane to
the physical consciousness. Always this is accompanied by a fading of the first
deep experiences and a descent to the neutral obscure inertia which is the
bed-rock of the unredeemed physical nature. It is there that the Light, the
Power, the Ananda of the Divine has to descend and
Page ─ 1423
transform
everything, driving away for ever all obscurity and all inertia and
establishing the radiant Energy, the perfect Light and the unchanging Bliss.
There and not in the mind or the higher vital is all the difficulty, but there
too must be the victory and the foundation of the new world. I do not wish to
disguise from you the difficulty of this great and tremendous change or the
possibility that you may have a long and hard work before you, but are you
really unwilling to face it and take your share in the great work? Will you
reject the greatness of this endeavour to follow a mad irrational impulse
towards some more exciting work of the hour or the moment for which you have no
true call in any part of your nature?
There is no true reason for despondency; in nothing that has
passed do I find any good ground for it. The difficulties you experience are
nothing to those that others have felt and yet conquered them, others who were
not stronger than you. All that has happened is that by this descent into the
physical consciousness the ordinary external human nature has come to the front
with its elemental imperfections and subconscient unsatisfied impulses and it
is to these that the contrary force is appealing. The mind and the higher vital
have put away from them the ideas and illusions which gave them a sanction, an illusion
of legitimacy and even nobility in their satisfaction. But the root of them,
their inherent irrational push for satisfaction, has not yet gone − this,
for instance, is the reason for the sexual movements which you have recently
felt in sleep or in waking. This was inevitable. All that is needed is for your
psychic being to come forward and open you to the direct and real and constant
inner contact of myself and the Mother. Hitherto your soul has expressed itself
through the mind and its ideals and admirations or through the vital and its
higher joys and aspirations; but that is not sufficient to conquer the physical
difficulty and enlighten and transform Matter. It is your soul in itself, your
psychic being that must come in front, awaken entirely and make the fundamental
change. The psychic being will not need the support of intellectual ideas or
outer signs and helps. It is that alone that can give you the direct feeling of
the Divine, the constant nearness, the inner support and aid. You will not then
feel the
Page ─ 1424
Mother
remote or have any further doubt about the realisation; for the mind thinks and
the vital craves, but the soul feels and knows the Divine.
Cast away from you these movements of doubt, depression and
the rest which are no part of your true and higher nature. Reject these
suggestions of inability, unfitness and all these irrational movements of an
alien force. Remain faithful to the Light of your soul even when it is hidden
by clouds. My help and the Mother's will be there working behind even in the
moments when you cannot feel it. The one need for you and for all is to be,
even in the darkness of the powers of obscurity of the physical consciousness,
stubbornly faithful to your soul and to the remembrance of the Divine Call. Be faithful
and you will conquer.
When
I spoke of being faithful to the light of the soul and the divine Call, I was
not referring to anything in the past or to any lapse on your part. I was
simply affirming the great need in all crises and attacks, − to refuse to
listen to any suggestions, impulses, lures and to oppose to them all the call
of the Truth, the imperative beckoning of the Light. In all doubt and depression,
to say, “I belong to the Divine, I cannot fail”; to all suggestions of impurity
and unfitness, to reply, “I am a child of Immortality chosen by the Divine; I
have but to be true to myself and to Him − the victory is sure; even if I
fell, I would rise again”; to all impulses to depart and serve some smaller
ideal, to reply, “This is the greatest, this is the Truth that alone can
satisfy the soul within me; I will endure through all tests and tribulations to
the very end of the divine journey”. This is what I mean by faithfulness to the
Light and the Call.
These
are things which come almost inevitably in one degree or another at a certain
critical stage through which almost everyone has to pass and which usually
lasts for an uncomfortably long time but which need not be at all conclusive or
definitive.
Page ─ 1425
Usually,
if one persists, it is the period of darkest night before the dawn which comes
to every or almost every spiritual aspirant. It is due to a plunge one has to
take into the sheer physical consciousness unsupported by any true mental light
or by any vital joy in life, for these usually withdraw behind the veil, though
they are not, as they seem to be, permanently lost. It is a period when doubt,
denial, dryness, greyness and all kindred things come up with a great force and
often reign completely for a time. It is after this stage has been successfully
crossed that the true light begins to come, the light which is not of the mind
but of the spirit. The spiritual light, no doubt, comes to some to a certain
extent and to a few to a considerable extent, in the earlier stages, though
that is not the case with all − for some have to wait till they can clear
out the obstructing stuff in the mind, vital and physical consciousness, and
until then get only a touch now and then. But even at the best this earlier
spiritual light is never complete until the darkness of the physical
consciousness has been faced and overcome. It is not by one's own fault that
one falls into this state, it can come when one is trying one's best to
advance. It does not really indicate any radical disability in the nature but
certainly it is a hard ordeal and one has to stick very firmly to pass through
it. It is difficult to explain these things because the psychological necessity
is difficult for the ordinary human reason to understand or to accept.
There
is nothing to be discouraged about. The fact is that after having been so long
in the mental and vital plane you have become aware of the physical
consciousness, and the physical consciousness in everybody is like that. It is
inert, conservative, does not want to move, to change − it clings to its
habits (what people call their character) or its habits (habitual movements)
cling to it and repeat themselves like a clock working in a persistent
mechanical way. When you have cleared your vital somewhat, things go down and
stick there. You see, if you have become self-conscious, you put pressure, perhaps,
but the physical responds very slowly, hardly at first it seems to move at all.
The
Page ─ 1426
remedy
is aspiration steady and unchanging, patient work, the psychic in the physical,
calling down the light and force into these obscure parts. The light brings the
consciousness of what is there; the force has to follow and work on them till
they change or disappear.
It
is always the effect of the physical consciousness being uppermost (so long as
it is not entirely changed) that one feels like this − like an ordinary
man or worse, altogether in the outer consciousness, the inner consciousness
veiled, the action of yoga power apparently suspended. This happens in the
earlier stages also, but it is not quite complete usually then because something
of the mind and vital is active in the physical still, or even if the
interruption of sadhana is complete, it does not last long and so one does not
so much notice it. But when from the mental and vital stage of the yoga one
comes down into the physical, this condition which is native to the physical
consciousness fully manifests and is persistent for long periods. It happens
because one has to come down and deal with this part directly by entering into
it, − for if that is not done, there can be no complete change of the
nature. What has to be done is to understand that it is a stage and to persist
in the faith that it will be overcome. If this is done, then it will be easier
for the Force, working behind the veil at first, then in front to bring out the
yoga consciousness into this outer physical shell and make it luminous and
responsive. If one keeps steadily the faith and quietude, then this can be more
quickly done − if the faith gets eclipsed or the quietude disturbed by
the long difficulty, then it takes longer but even then it will be done; for,
though not felt, the Force is there at work. It can only be prevented if one breaks
away or throws up the sadhana, because one becomes too impatient of the difficulty
to go through with it. That is the one thing that should never be done.
Page ─ 1427
It
means that there is only one sadhana for all parts, not a separate mental
sadhana, vital sadhana or physical sadhana − but the action of the
sadhana is applied sometimes separately to each part, sometimes on the contrary
the action is the mental and vital together, or vital and physical together, or
all three together. But it is the same sadhana always.
When
I explained about the physical inertia, I meant that it was this which had been
preventing the elimination of the old movements all along and enabled them to
return when they had been pushed out − for it is in the material
half-conscious or subconscient that there is the bed-rock of the resistance.
When this comes up and shows itself in its separate existence, not sustained by
the mind and vital, acting by the power of its own inertia and not covered by
the sanction of the mind or the vital, only repeating the old movements by
force of old habit − it is then possible to meet the resistance at its
root instead of cutting off the flowers and fruits and branches when they
appear.
It is precisely this loathness to do anything that must be
got rid of − for it is simply an acquiescence in the force of the inertia.
If you can do nothing else, the old methods of violence to yourself etc. will
obviously be unfruitful − you should call on the Divine Peace and force
to descend and deal with it and open yourself to the action. If this
obstructing physical is made to admit and respond to that, then the key of the
solution will be there.
I
have said that your consciousness has come down into direct contact with the
external physical nature which is always full of the lower movements and when
that happens you see them as they are, when they are not under the control of
the mind and psychic. Everybody has to come into this direct contact − otherwise
there can be no transformation of this part of the being.
Page ─ 1428
Yes,
certainly, that is what I am insisting on − the bringing of realisation
into this inert physical part which has made itself prominent. When any part of
the being becomes prominent like this showing all its defects and limitations
− here inertia or incapacity (apravrtti),
obscurity or forgetfulness (aprakāśa),
it is in order to get set right, − it has come up for a first or preliminary
transformation. Peace and light in the mind, love and sympathy in the heart,
calm and power in the vital, a settled receptivity and response (prakāśa, pravrtti) in the physical are the necessary change.
You
feel as you do only because you are largely identified with the part that has
not undergone change and so you feel the difficulty, even the impossibility of
changing. But although the difficulty is there, the impossibility does not
exist. Even this identification may be helpful, for so the change can be
radical by a direct action in the part itself or an indirect influence upon it
through the mind or higher vital. Rest and restore your physical forces, open
so that the Mother's Force may freely work on you, all trouble pass away and a
new and stronger movement commence.
What
you describe is the material consciousness; it is mostly subconscient, but the
part of it that is conscious is mechanical, inertly moved by habits or by the
forces of the lower nature. Always repeating the same unintelligent and
unenlightened movements, it is attached to the routine and established rule of
what already exists, unwilling to change, unwilling to receive the Light or
obey the higher Force. Or, if it is willing, then it is unable. Or, if it is
able, then it turns the action given to it by the Light or the Force into a new
mechanical routine and so takes out of it all soul and life. It is obscure,
stupid, indolent, full of ignorance and inertia, darkness and slowness of tamas.
It is this material consciousness into which we are seeking
to bring first the higher (divine or spiritual) Light and Power and
Page ─ 1429
Ananda,
and then the supramental Truth which is the object of our yoga.
I do
not see why you doubt the fulfilment in your material consciousness. If there
is faith, quietude, openness in the rest of the being, the material is bound to
open also. Tamas, inertia, ignorance, stupidity, littleness, obstruction to the
true movement are universal characteristics of the material consciousness, so
long as it is not enlightened, regenerated and transformed from above, − they
are not peculiar to yours. Therefore, there is here no sufficient reason or
justification for the doubt you describe.
When the supramental comes down fully into the material
consciousness, it will create the right conditions there. The oneness will be
created, the constant presence and sense of contact will be felt in the
material and there will be all the actual physical contact that is needed. The
sadness you speak of is not psychic − for “painful longing” belongs to
the vital, not to the psychic. The psychic never feels a sadness from
disappointed desire, because that is not in its nature; the sorrow it sometimes
feels is when it sees the Divine rejected or the mental, vital, physical in man
or in nature turning away from the Truth to follow perversion, darkness or
ignorance. However, with the reign of the supramental even the vital external
nature is bound to change and therefore there will be no chance of any feelings
of this character.
It
is the most physical consciousness of which you have become aware; it is like
that in almost everyone: when one gets fully or exclusively into it, one feels
it to be like that of an animal, either obscure and restless or inert and
stupid and in either condition not open to the Divine. It is only by bringing
the Force and higher consciousness into it that it can fundamentally alter.
When these things show themselves do not be upset by their emergence, but
understand that they are there to be changed.
Here as elsewhere, quiet is the first thing needed, to keep
the consciousness quiet, not allow it to get agitated and in turmoil.
Page ─ 1430
Then
in the quiet to call for the Force to clear up all this obscurity and change
it.
I
understand that you have arrived at a prolonged lull or period of emptiness in
your sadhana. This often happens especially when one is thrown out into the
physical and external consciousness. The nervous and physical parts then become
prominent and seem to become the standard of the being with that disappearance
of the yoga consciousness and the sensitiveness to small and outward things
which you describe. A stage like this however may very well be an interval
before a fresh progress. What you have to do is to insist on making time for meditation
− at any time of the day when
you are least likely to be disturbed − and through the meditation getting
back the touch. There may be some difficulty because the physical consciousness
is uppermost, but a persistent aspiration will bring it back. When once you
again feel the connection re-established between the inner being and the outer,
call down the peace and light and power into the latter so as to build up a
basis for a constant consciousness in the most external mind and being which
will accompany you in work and action as much as in meditation and solitude.
“At
the mercy of the external sounds and external bodily sensations”, “no control
to drop the ordinary consciousness at will”, “the whole tendency of the being
away from yoga” − all that is unmistakably applicable to the physical
mind and the physical consciousness when they isolate themselves, as it were,
and take up the whole front, pushing the rest into the background. When a part
of the being is brought forward to be worked upon for change, this kind of
all-occupying emergence, the dominant activity of that part as if it alone
existed very usually happens, and unfortunately it is always what has to be
changed, the undesirable conditions, the difficulties of that part which rise
first and obstinately hold the field and recur. In the physical it is inertia,
obscurity, inability that come up and the obstinacy of these
Page ─ 1431
things.
The only thing to do in this unpleasant phase is to be more obstinate than the
physical inertia and to persist in a fixed endeavour − steady persistency
without any restless struggle − to get a wide and permanent opening made
even in this solid rock of obstruction.
It
means that you are in full grips with the subconscient physical. However heavy
and tedious the resistance you have to persevere till you have got the Peace,
Knowledge, Force down there in place of the inertia.
The
physical sadhana is to bring down the higher light and power and peace and
Ananda into the body consciousness, to get rid of the inertia of the physical,
the doubts, limitations, external tendency of the physical mind, the defective
energies of the vital physical (nerves) and bring in instead the true
consciousness there so that the physical may be a perfect instrument for the
Divine Will. The food and care for the body is only to get it into good
condition, afterwards it would not be necessary to attend to such things.
You need not worry about that. When there is a strong inward
tendency, the body not being yet conscious enough to share the experience in a
waking state tries to assimilate the descending forces through sleep. This is a
common experience. When it has assimilated enough, it will be more ready.
The
difference lies in the fact that those who are doing sadhana live on the
physical plane in order to transform it − under the pressure of a Force
created by the sadhana which urges towards that and must continue till it is
achieved. Those who do not do sadhana live on the physical plane not to
transform it but to continue it as it is − there is no such Force or
pressure or necessity or urge. Those who are not sadhaks but have their minds
turned to the higher consciousness are preparing for sadhana and will
Page ─ 1432
one
day do it − whatever that sadhana may be.
The prevalence of the physical difficulties when one comes
down into the physical is the same phenomenon as the prevalence of the vital
difficulties when one is on the vital plane. Transformation implies facing the
difficulties and changing or overcoming what arises in each part of the being
so that that part may respond to what is higher, but the full change of the
whole can only come by the ascent to the Above and the descent from Above. The
first step of that (usually though not always) is the realisation of the self
above and the descent of the higher peace into all the being down to the most
physical.
So
far as it [living in the physical consciousness] can be said to be
distinguishable by outward signs, it is a state of fundamental passivity in
which one is and does what the forces of the physical plane make one be and do.
When one lives in the mind, there is an active mental intelligence and mental
will that tries to control and shape action and experience and life and
everything else. When one is in the vital one is full of energy and enthusiasm
and passion and force which may be right or wrong but is very much alive. These
things in the physical inertia either disappear or become weak or are forces
that act
upon
the system occasionally but are not possessed by it. This condition may not be
absolute, for one has a mind and a vital, but it is what predominates. There
are two ways of getting out of this − one is to rise above in the self
and see the physical from there as an instrument, not oneself, the other is to
bring down the divine Force from above and make the physical the instrument of
that Force.
You
cannot so long as you have a body live without the physical consciousness but
you can live more centrally in the psychic and other parts and by them
transform the physical.
Page ─ 1433
[Defects
of the physical consciousness:] There are many − but mainly obscurity,
inertia, tamas, a passive acceptance of the play of wrong forces, inability to
change, attachment to habits, lack of plasticity, forgetfulness, loss of
experiences or realisations gained, unwillingness to accept the Light or to
follow it, incapacity (through tamas or through attachment or through passive
reaction to accustomed forces) to do what it admits to be the Right and the
Best.
This
negation is the very nature of the physical resistance and the physical
resistance is the whole base of the denial of the Divine in the world. All in
the physical is persistent, obstinate, with a massive force of negation and
inertia − if it were not so, sadhana would be extremely cursory. You have
to face this character of the physical resistance and conquer it however often
it may rise. It is the price of the transformation of the earth-consciousness.
Apart
from the individual difficulty there is a general difficulty in the physical
earth-nature. Physical nature is slow and inert and unwilling to change; its
tendency is to be still and take long periods of time for a little progress. It
is very difficult for even the strongest mental or vital or even psychic will
to overcome this inertia. It is only by bringing down constantly the consciousness
and force and light from above that it can be done. Therefore there must be a
constant will and aspiration for that and for the change and it must be a
steady and patient will not tired out even by the utmost resistance of the
physical nature.
It
is the nature of the physical mind to be obstinate. Physical nature exists by
constant repetition of the same thing − only a constant presentation of
different forms of itself. This obstinate recurrence is therefore part of its
nature when it is in activity;
Page ─ 1434
otherwise
it remains in a dull inertia. When therefore we want to get rid of the old
movements of physical nature, they resist by this kind of obstinate recurrence.
One has to be very persistent in rejection to get rid of it.
There are two aspects of physical Nature as of all Nature
− the individual and the universal. All things come into one from the
universal Nature − but the individual physical keeps some of them and
rejects others, and to those it keeps it gives a personal form. So these things
can be said to be both inside it and coming outside from within or created by
it because it gives a special form and also outside and coming in from outside.
But when one wants to get rid of them, one first throws out all that is within
into the surrounding Nature − from there the universal Nature tries to
bring them back or bring in new and similar things of its own to replace them.
One has then constantly to reject this invasion. By constant rejection, the
force of recurrence finally dwindles and the individual becomes free and able
to bring the higher consciousness and its movements into the physical being.
The
earth-consciousness does not want to change, so it rejects what comes down to
it from above − it has always done so. It is only if those who have taken
this yoga open themselves and are willing to change their lower nature that
this unwillingness can disappear.
What stands in the way, of course, is always the vital ego
with its ignorance and the pride of its ignorance, and the physical
consciousness with its inertia which resents and resists any call to change and
its indolence which does not like to
take
the trouble − it finds it more comfortable to go on its own way repeating
always the same old movements and, at best, expecting everything to be done for
it in some way at some time.
The first thing is to have the right inner attitude − you
have that; the rest is the will to transform oneself and the vigilance to
perceive and reject all that belongs to the ego and the tamasic persistence of
the lower nature. Finally, to keep oneself always open to the Mother in every
part of the being
Page ─ 1435
so
that the process of transformation may find no hindrance.
Dullness
and dispersion are the two sides of the physical's resistance to the peace and
concentrated power. They correspond to the inertia and the chaotic activity of
physical Nature, that aspect of it which makes some scientists now say that all
is brought about by chance and there is no certitude of things but only
probability.
The
inertia of the physical consciousness is always a difficult thing to eliminate −
it is that, more even than any vital resistance, which keeps all the movements
of the ignorance recurring even when the knowledge is there and the will to change.
But this difficulty has to be faced and overcome by an equal perseverance in
the will of the sadhak. It is a steady flame that must burn, as steady as the
obstruction is obstinate. Do not therefore be discouraged by the persistence of
the obstruction of the ignorance. The persistence of your own will to conquer
with the Mother's force supporting it will come to the end of the resistance.
The
physical's tendency to inertia is very great; even after the habit of living in
the higher consciousness is there, some part may feel the pressure of the
inertia − generally the outermost or most material parts. The inertia
usually rises up from the subconscient. It does not abolish the higher
consciousness in the physical, but dulls its action or else brings it down from
a higher to a lower level, e.g. from the intuition to the higher mind or from
the higher to the lower ranges of overmind. For some time it resists the completeness of the siddhi. It is only
when the most material and the subconscient and the
environmental
consciousness are quite liberated that this retarding or lowering effect of the
primal Inertia is entirely overcome.
Page ─ 1436
Everything
can be responded to − Inertia also can spread waves of itself like other
things.
In
dealing with the physical and subconscient the working is always slower than
when it acts on the mind and vital because the resistance of physical stuff is
always heavier and less intelligent and adaptable; but as a compensation the
work done in the being by this slower movement is in the end more complete,
solid and durable.
The
physical obstruction is less boisterous [than the vital obstruction], but I
have not found it less obstinate or less troublesome.
The
difficulty of the physical nature comes inevitably in the course of the
development of the sadhana. Its obstruction, its inertia, its absence of
aspiration or movement have to show themselves before they can be got rid of
− otherwise it will always remain undetected, hampering even the best
sadhana and preventing its completeness. This coming up of the physical nature
lasts longer or less according to the circumstances, but there is none who does
not go through it. What is necessary is not to get troubled or anxious or
impatient, for that only makes it last more, but to put entire confidence in
the Mother and quietly persist in faith, patience and steady will for the
complete change. It is so that the Mother's force can best work in the being.
The
first means is not to get upset when it [inertia] comes or when it stays. The
second is to detach yourself, not only yourself above but yourself below and
not identify. The third is to reject everything that is raised by the inertia
and not regard it as your own or accept it at all.
Page ─ 1437
If you can do these things then there will be something in
you that remains perfectly quiet even in the greatest inertia. Through that
quiet part you can bring down peace, force, even light and knowledge into the
inertia itself.
Inertia
or anything else must be felt as separate, not part of one's real self which is
one with the Divine.
The
adverse forces feel that there is something in you that is discountenanced and
restive because of the continuance of the inertia and they hope that by
pressing more and more they will create a revolt. What is important for you in
these circumstances is to make your faith, surrender and Samata absolute. That
is as great and essential a progress as to have high experiences, etc.
It
[the use of violence for the change of the physical] was done by some people,
but I don't believe in its usefulness. No doubt the physical is an obstinate
obstacle, but it must be enlightened, persuaded, pressed even to change, but
not oppressed or violently driven. People use violence with the mind, vital,
body because they are in a hurry, but my own observation has always been that
it leads to more reactions and hindrances and not to a genuinely sound advance.
It
[the result of the obstruction of the physical consciousness] depends on the
weak points of the individual and the stage of his progress. In a general way
the obstruction creates an inertia which impedes the working of the higher
Powers. In the early stage it can obstruct progress altogether. Afterwards it
works to slow it down or else impede it by intervals of stationary
Page ─ 1438
inertia.
The main difficulty of the physical consciousness is that it is unable, before
it is transformed, of maintaining any tension of tapasya − it wants
periods of assimilation, sinking back into the ordinary consciousness to rest,
− also there is a constant forgetfulness of what has been done etc.
It
[the weakness of the will] is a first result of coming down into the physical
consciousness or of the physical consciousness coming up prominently − formerly
you were much in the mind and vital. The physical consciousness is full of
inertia − it wants not to move but to be moved by whatever forces and
that is its habit. This inertia has to be cured by putting it into contact with
the right forces from above. That is why I asked you to aspire for the higher
wideness, purity and peace, so that that may occupy the physical and the true
Force work instead of these invading ideas and impulses.
The
period of no-effort is usually when the physical consciousness is uppermost
− for the nature of that is inertia, to be moved by the higher forces or
to be moved by the lower forces or by any forces, but not to move itself. One
must still use one's efforts if one can, but the great thing is to be able to
call down the Force from above into the physical − otherwise to remain
perfectly quiet and, undisturbed, expect its coming.
t
is only by a more constant dynamic force descending into an unalterable
equality and peace that the physical nature's normal tendency can be
eradicated.
The normal tendency of the physical nature is to be inert
and in its inertia to respond only to the ordinary vital forces, not to the
higher forces. If one has a perfect equality and peace then one can be
unaffected by the spreading of the inertia
Page ─ 1439
and
bring down into it gradually or quickly the same peace with a force of the
higher consciousness which can alter it. When that is there there can be no
longer the difficulty and fluctuations with a preponderance of inertia such as
now you are having.
The
greater difficulty is because the sadhana is now taking place directly on the
physical plane, where the force of a habit or habitual movement once formed is
very great. When the sadhana is taking place on the mental or vital plane, it
is more easy to control or change, because the mind and vital are more plastic
than the physical. But on the other hand if something is definitely gained on
the physical plane, there is a more lasting and complete fulfilment than when
it is on the mental or vital alone.
Probably
in '33 you were doing more tapasya and putting a strong control on yourself? At
any rate that was the state at one time. Afterwards when you came down from the
mental-vital level, you let yourself go for a time, removing much of the control,
hence now you find a difficulty in re-establishing it, − due to the habit
of automatic repetition which is a characteristic of the physical nature. You
have now to get the control in a different way by the establishment of the
peace and building the higher consciousness upon it, the spiritual control
replacing that of mental tapasya.
No,
it is not necessary to lose the mental control; it is best to replace it
gradually by the psychic or spiritual. But it happens to many that they lose it
before the other is ready or while it is still imperfect and then the
Nature-forces act in the physical consciousness which is sometimes held by the
descending Peace or Power from above, sometimes by the ordinary Nature-forces.
This alternation happens at one stage at least to almost everybody until the
higher state prevails.
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This over-sensitive brooding on past blows to the vital is
an unhealthy sensitiveness. What is past ought not to have a hold like that but
be allowed to fade out.
In
the physical being the power of past impressions is very great, because it is
by the process of repeated impressions that consciousness was made to manifest
in matter − and also by the habitual reactions of consciousness to these
impressions, what the psychologists, I suppose, would call behaviour. According
to one school consciousness consists only of these things − but that is
the usual habit of stretching one detail of Nature to explain the whole of her.
What
you describe is what the Gita means by the realisation that all action is done
by the Prakriti. You feel it mechanical because you are in the physical
consciousness where all is mechanism. On the mental and vital plane one can
have the same experience, but of the actions as a play of forces. What is
lacking at present in you is the other side of the experience viz. that of the
silent Atman or else of the witness Purusha calm, tranquil, free, pure and
undisturbed by the play of the Prakriti. It tries to come and you are on the
point of going into it, but the tendency of externalisation is still too
strong. This tendency took you when you came down into the physical − for
it is the nature of the ordinary physical consciousness to precipitate itself
into the action of the external personality. You have to get back the power of
the internal consciousness − above as Atman, below as Purusha first
witness and then master of the nature.
It
is due to the influence of the physical consciousness. The physical
consciousness or at least the more external parts of it are, as I have told
you, in their nature inert − obeying whatever
Page ─ 1441
force
they are habituated to obey, but not acting on their own initiative. When there
is a strong influence of the physical inertia or when one is down in this part
of the consciousness the mind feels like the material Nature that action of
will is impossible. Mind and vital nature are on the contrary all for will and
initiative and so when one is in mind or vital or acting under their influence
will feels itself always ready to be active.
It
is the neutrality of the physical consciousness which says, “I move only when I
am moved. Move me who can.”
The
physical is the slave of certain forces which create a habit and drive it
through the mechanical power of the habit. So long as the mind gives consent,
you do not notice the slavery; but if the mind withdraws its consent, then you
feel the servitude, you feel a force pushing you in spite of the mind's will.
It is very obstinate and repeats itself till the habit, the inner habit
revealing itself in the outward act, is broken. It is like a machine which once
set in motion repeats the same movement. You need not be alarmed or distressed;
a quiet persistent aspiration will bring you to the point where the habit
breaks and you are free.
The
habit in the physical is obstinate and seems unchangeable because it always
recurs − even when one thinks it is gone. But it is not really
unchangeable; if the physical mind detaches itself, stands separate, refuses to
accept it, then the habit in the physical begins to lose its force of
repetition. Sometimes it goes slowly, sometimes (but this is less frequent) it
stops suddenly and recurs no more.
The
condition is that you must bring the sadhana into your
Page ─ 1442
physical
consciousness and live for the sadhana and the Divine only. You must give up
positively the bad habits that still persist and never resume those that have
ceased or been interrupted. Inner experiences are helpful to the mind and
higher vital for change, but for the lower vital and the outer being a sadhana
of self-discipline is indispensable. The external actions and the spirit in them must change − your
external thoughts and actions must be for the Divine only. There must be self-restraint,
entire truthfulness, a constant thought of the Divine in all you do. This is
the way for the change of the lower vital. By your constant self-dedication and
self-discipline the force will be brought down into the external and the change
made.
Page ─ 1443
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